Becoming wealthy by belly size.

 By Arc. Duru Chimezie

This is a sponsored submission from 360talkatives blog.

DURU CHIMEZIE says there is no hope for the slim in this country, more so when you have a fat belly. While he agrees that it is an entirely different case for the woman fold, he still points out that being exactly fat wasn't a good forward step for them. "Why would you like to have a pot belly even?", that is the question he asks on BANTER WITHOUT DOORS this week.

Have you ever seen a really really fat tummy? I mean, a tummy just too fat that the owner spends over one-third of his 24hours buttoning and re-buttoning his shirt! Have you ever seen such? Like the tummy is in every sense an obstacle? Doubling as a tummy as well as an inhibition? Have you? Terribly big in such a way that you feel genuinely hurt in the heart by mere seeing it? Nice. That is what we are going to talk about today. The big fat belly, and the many postulations about it.

If you are slim, I pity you. Then if you so slim that everybody who sees your belly calls it flat, then you might as well choose a distant planet for vacation! My reason is simply; our part of the world has no place for slim ‘attractive’ people. For all the seeming love-in for runway models and beauty queens, only but a handful of men actually love having slender girls as partners. Now, we are not saying they all prefer fat girls. Not really. Rather, they simply want their girls to have some ‘reasonable meat’. Simply put, not exactly slim but far from fat! But then, if you were a guy and were slim; what about that? Even if we could choose to pretend like we don’t care about the preferences of the ladies and what stature of men they fancy most, the preferences of the men on who they accept as ‘real men’ still would count massively! In short, woe befalls you if fellow men called you slim, slender, thin….anything not-fat.

And why would I say that? Well, begin with asking the question fully: “why would I say that when I am actually more like the slim than the fat?” And the answer is, because it is true! Being slim (or slender if you want to make it a bit more respectful to the ear), in our part of the world is a hanging (invisible) disability. Disability because everyone either thinks you don’t eat enough, or you ain’t grown up enough or specifically you are just not human enough! Period! What the western world thinks about it, matters so little here as long as they are concerned. In fact, while being slick (another decoration for slim/thin) is more of a way of life over there, with a lot being put in clothing-lines (skinny jeans, etc), music and entertainment just to see that more and more people desire to remain or become slim, over here, gaining a 6pack work-out accolade is one of every teenager’s 30things-I’d-do-before-I-turn-30.

The irony isn’t even obvious yet! You know what? The issue isn’t exactly how thin you look or how your perpetual cloth preference is usually always Xtra-Xtra-Small. Not really. Even though it looks like it is, considering what you hear them say and refer to. The real issue, is the size of the belly! If you were small, kinda or let’s just say slim, but yet had the tummy of a near-delivery pregnant woman, nobody would call you slim indeed! I fact, most of the emphasis will be about ‘how big you’ve been growing these days’. Totally absurd! So ain’t the craze and infatuation, all about the size of the belly?! And isn’t the irony even more complex when you consider that our fathers and older folks, are doing a lot with their lives, to see that their bellies are reduced as they are causing more harm than good while on the other hand, our young men are taking pride in the big silly thing? Of course it is!

Since it is already clear the whole big belly love-in is coming and found amongst the men fold, can we now ask, what exactly does the big belly do for you? What contribution do you find so endearing and profiting to begin to wish and desire to have a belly that would always obstruct you from kissing your wife when you get married? What is the moral of having a thing that will always want to break up your shirt buttons? The answers have been rather ridiculous. Most have preferred it simply because of the seeming respect it gives. I have already explained earlier that in our world over here, you are considered more relevant if you had a hanging belly. And some have coveted it because of how non-slim it would make them look. But then, the more ridiculous of the lot, desire a big fat belly because it would make them appear wealthy. Ridiculous in all senses, quite!

So going by our rich-happy hanging-tummy-desiring friends, I should/will call/perceive/think of a bus pauper of net-value, a mighty $100, to be the same as $375,000-a-week earning Baseball player as long as he had a fat tummy. Ridiculous in all senses, quite! And if I made any mistakes of looking at somebody like Kanu Nwankwo, whose last weekly wage was almost a £100,000, I should call him a pauper simply because he has a near-non-existent belly. Ridiculous in all senses, quite! Big belly does not a wealthy man make! (Big belly does not make a wealthy man, in case you need the correct arrangement).

Your desire to own a big belly is a fundamental right of yours. But what fundamental rights don’t do, is stopping the repercussion of what fundamental rights earned you. A fat belly (mostly on males), is simply a product of accumulated fat and tissue (I’m no med guy but I made a B₁ in Biology). Fat as we know it, is a high risk for heart disorders and increased blood pressure! A fat belly is equally a container for amassed sugar. No surprise that alcohol is the fastest means of achieving the highly desired belly bigness. So you’ve heard it, the more alcohol you take, the more the increase.

Fundamentally, there are more salient reasons why I would think somebody to be reasonable, attractive, handsome, human-enough, intelligent, responsible and more importantly, wealthy/comfortable. And, having a big fat belly, isn’t one of those. Big belly does not a wealthy man make! See you fells next week!

You can read more articles like this from Duru Chimezie, on 360talkatives by clicking here.

PLEASE CAN WE STOP THESE MANY THINGS?

By Arc. Duru Chimezie

This is a sponsored submission from 360talkatives blog.

Out of a rather difficult schedule Banter Without Doors comes to you with a list of many things we should stop doing.

It is a very noisy afternoon here (it could be morning wherever you are though and of course less noisy) and I have my hands placed on my warm plastic keyboard. Hoping to type something, but yet to do so. Willing to produce an amazing banter like always but devoid of what exactly to type or where to begin even. Wouldn't know if the entire pressure from work, in this present week is really getting to me. In fact, I am at the reception of a hotel waiting for a project meeting of fellow architects, an engineer and a quantity surveyor to begin. Barely 30 minutes away from the meeting, the idea of choosing to use the little time between now and the meeting, to get this done, explains how tight my schedule has been lately.

Anyways, schedule or no schedule, I would do a Banter of the Week, wouldn't I? After all, you are never responsible for urging me to do weekly Banters, right? So I obviously placed the yoke on myself and just have to bear the cup alone, right? Well...wrong! But....I am going to do the banter even though I don't know what exactly to do. Or do I? Yea, I think I suddenly do. I mean, why can't we just talk about things we should stop doing? As in, there are over a billion things you do each day, which you shouldn't be doing. I am not referring to stuffs like, talking while eating, etc. Not exactly. Even though Banter Without Doors would really love you to stop talking while eating. But, I am actually referring to those things we do, which we never knew we shouldn't be doing. Now, let's get on the ride.

So the first thing on my list of what we need to stop doing is...making our android phones sound like Blackberries! I agree there has been a lot of envy and jealousy behind the use of android when actually you dreamt all your life to own a blackberry. I know that despite how superior android appears to blackberries currently (judging by market share, preference and coverage), some people still pride themselves in being associated with anything blackberry. But what's the point? What's the point of owning an android phone and then keep making us all think it's blackberry while still being android? Remain Blackberry if you love blackberry or remain android if you love android. Tying yourself up on some high prison fence wouldn't do any good. So can we just stop using blackberry tones and sound notes for our whatsapp messages, text messages, everything?!! In fact, can we just change the notification sound on our bb messenger (for android) to some other thing? Maybe a cat mew, or a goat bleat, in fact anything! Can we?

Conductors are another point here. I refer to conductors who 'conduct' passengers who board intra-state buses. Can we just stop something about them? I don't ever think there is anyone of us who does not always undervalue and if possible, affront the bus conductor. To us, he is possibly the cheapest man on the street. And probably, the most useless. The conductor to many, must be that tout at the motor park, who totally only deserves to be in a cell or prison. We easily equate them to having a huge tendency to cheat us when we pay our bus fares. We feel to pour insults and verbal garbage at them, simply because they are bus conductors. Now can we just remember that these guys are human, and are sons to mothers and fathers somewhere? Can we just stop feeling we are perpetually superior and good for something while they are good for nothings? Can we?

Bankers are on the fly. Getting into the bank gives you an initial feel of visiting the land of immortals. Everybody appears overly smart-looking and lost in their own world! Willing to ignore you for another costumer at any given moment and when they wish to advice you on what you need to do towards a problem, they make it sound like they are actually schooling a moron. But why? Ain't they your average guys and ladies who only just got decent paying jobs, anymore? What then warrants the need for that sense of immortality? Can bankers just attempt coming back to earth? Can they just stop being spirits? Can they?

A celebrity I assume, is anybody who has become so popular that he or she is endlessly celebrated. And then a model is a celebrity only after she becomes as popular and celebrated as a celebrity. However, for a model who comes so close to becoming a celebrity only for her to lose it at the end, what's the need for her to become fake? I want to believe that everybody does watch the TV. And that we all have seen beauty pageant contests with all the participating models being asked to get to the podium so that the eventual winner(s) can be announced right before them. Now what irks my goat, is what follows right after. You'd observe that as soon as the winner is announced, all the other participating contestants who are equally standing on the podium, begin to grin and smile. (what??????!!!!) So, how can?! You only just lost!! And goodness knows that you'd be really very heavy with tears within, and if possible, envy! But instead you pretend and smile to all of us, while the winner collects her crown and 'banner' (wouldn't know what else to call it). Please can you models stop the deception? Can you please begin showing us your real feelings when you lose? Can you?

Lastly, I thought about theft. Basically, laptop theft. After all, doing a banter each week wouldn't be possible if I didn't own laptops I could use. But then, what is the best measure for controlling laptop theft? I have heard so many suggestions like, not carrying it around at night, setting up a password or when possible, installing a tracker on it. While those suggestions sound quite good, they are only just short term remedies. However after comparing the frequency of theft in cases when the laptop owner is a male and cases when it is a female, I came down to a conclusion - handbags! Ladies who own laptops these days, carry them in big fat handbags. These handbags are so deep that they can take two or more of them yet appear like your average handbag. This had led to an increased safety of the female laptop. So...why can't everybody do same? I mean, can we the guys just stop using any other bags? Can we please begin using the handbag? Can we?

The questions have been rhetoric but hoping for a reply. I will find you guys next week!

You can read more articles like this from Duru Chimezie, on 360talkatives by clicking here.

Banter without doors is a sponsored article that comes up every fridays. Don't miss it for anything in the world.

Your comments are like butter to my bread.. Pleeeaaassssseeee don't starve me!!! Follow us on twiter HERE like our page on facebook HERE Share this post to your friends, families.enemies infact everyone. FMB loves you.

24 WORDS FROM 2015 ELECTIONS, AND MY RIDICULOUS MEANINGS FROM THEM.

By Arc. Duru Chimezie

This is a sponsored submission from 360talkatives blog.

To DURU CHIMEZIE, a Political Party Logo is "any household items and furniture like brooms, umbrella, sofa, center-table, rug, etc". Here are the other 23 meanings he has given words and items from the 2015 elections. You'd really enjoy this.

Last week, we were adequately drunk with good ‘nonsenseness’ even though it was really fun, judging by the Whatsapp and text messages I got from readers (still wondering if placing comments on a blog is some sort of poisoned chalice, though). However, this week, I have chosen to feel that we could be a little bit saner and aware of what’s going on around us (being nonsense is equivalent to sitting in a lonely room and covering yourself up in four thick blankets and not knowing where you are). We can now address our immediate problems and make good noise about more useful things. Thus, I came up with this title. But I am grateful to my readers, for taking the time to read the two submissions after all.

So it’s election year (you must be living under a rock if you are only getting to know that now), and we have already been burnt to the marrow by the electioneering and politicking. The campaigns have been intense and people like myself have barely survived ear-drum damage arising from all manner of campaign jingles and slogans. Our ears are actually very full now. But how about the vocabulary we are served day in, day out? (Did I just say served? They are actually rather shoved into our mouths). I easily felt it could make for good reading. So after sitting down and doing some compiling, here are the most popular words I got to hear in this year’s election period. I also did you guys a favour by doing my best to add their meanings to them albeit some being rather….well, pointless. Here we go, still:

2015 ELECTION WORDS AND THEIR (RATHER SENSELESS) MEANINGS.

By Banter Without Doors

1. Asari Dokubo: (verb),

The act of threatening to war everybody if you lost in a cause.

(Application): “He asari-dokuboed us when he heard he might have failed the exam”

2. Chibuike Amaechi: (verb),

The act of being rewarded with the position of Campaign Chairman when you fail to secure that of the running mate.

(Application): “He promised to chibuike-amaechi me if I could support his trip to Qatar”

3. Okupe: (verb),

The act of lying for no reason.

(Application): “I know Douglas enough. He simply okupes even when not necessary”

4. FeBUHARI: (noun),

A new month of the calendar year.

(Application): “I wish to apply for the screening exam on the 41^st day of Febuhari. That will make my trip a lot more possible”

5. Boko Haram: (noun),

Any reason that can be given for postponing an election.

(Application): “Can we create a ‘boko haram’ situation? Because I don't see this elections holding.”

6. Election-Postponement: (verb),

The act of fighting Boko Haram in six-weeks.

(Application): “Reports say that the Ghanaian president and their military have an election-postponement plan to fight ISIS in Ghana?”

7. Party Logo: (noun),

Any household items and furniture like brooms, umbrella, sofa, center-table, rug, etc

(Application): “Please Michael, get the party logo and sweep this room for me. I am sleepy.”

8. Bigot: (noun),

Any presidential candidate who is a Christian and goes to church more often during the elections or any candidate who is a Northerner and attends meetings with Northern leaders during the elections.

(Application): “Since he has failed to swap from being a Christian to a Muslim, he is a religious bigot”

9. Campaign: (verb),

The act of washing your opponents dirty-linen in public, while calling them clueless and old.

(Application): “He campaigned me just because I am 80 years old”

10. INEC Chairman: (noun),

Any person, animal, place, thing, or object that you can blame once you lose an election.

(Application): “Plateau state was a bad INEC Chairman, we would have won if they had voted for us.”

11. Machinery: (noun)

A human-machine whose sole life-purpose is to rig elections.

(Application): “I will be hiring a new machinery for the coming elections. I have already bought and stored enough diesel”

12. Political Structure: (noun)

A very huge machine made up of human beings and with the task of helping the government in power to get back to power.

(Application): “He said the governor intends to take his political structure to a mechanical engineer for maintenance service”

13. Propaganda: (noun)

Anything bad but true that is being said about your candidate or party by your opponents.

(Application): “Even though N2000 is missing under my office, it is simple propaganda when they tell the public”

14. PVC: (noun)

INEC’s most favourite English word.

(Application): “We will try to make the PVC’s available before the PVC deadline so that the PVC machines can accept the PVCs from voters with their PVCs”

15. Old: (noun)

Anybody in the opposition you don’t like but see as a threat.

(Application): “He is more popular than me. But he is too old to win me”

16: Endorsement: (verb)

What you tell any politician you hope to gain material benefits from in future, once they visit you for support.

(Application): “I am going to endorse you for governorship. But always remember that I have interests in oil fields”

17: Political Party: (noun)

Any group of people that will willingly allow themselves to be fooled by you so as to have you in power.

(Application): “It's a pity you just have barely 80 million left in your account and cannot continue the campaign. Anyways what if I give you my last card, which is 3 million? Will you continue? 'Cos I really want you to win”

18: Political Party 2: (noun)

Any gathering of 6 to 8 people, hopping around with poorly-printed flyers and hoping to secure some funds from INEC.

(Application): “Can we form a political party? I need funds for a new car”

19: Presidential Candidate: (noun)

Anybody who is contesting for the Presidency but is less popular than his/her Local Government Chairman.

(Application): “I was trying to introduce Mr. Ojo, the presidential candidate, to residents of his street. Just 2 out the 12 of them knew he lived in the street”

20. Corruption: (verb),

The act of not stealing.

(Application): “Our Pastor corruptions money”

21: Election Campaign Trail: (verb)

The act of roller-coasting through the 36 states and the FCT - picking up 271 traditional chieftaincy titles in the process.

(Application): “We will election-campaign-trail before the end of March as I think I need a new set of traditional titles ”

22: Campaign Promise: (noun)

That big fat blue lie you tell us of which we know is a big fat lie but yet still cheer and hail you in a big fat way.

(Application): “He told us he will buy every Nigerian a car. I simply loved how he used his campaign promise. I will vote for him”

23: Party Decamping: (verb)

The act of simply cancelling your name behind your class exercise book and writing that of your enemies over it.

(Application): “I cannot party-decamp anymore - my exercise books are finished”

24: Twitter: (noun)

An electronic Nigerian Elections Tribunal.

(Application): “The governor's victory is questionable since they gave him victory on twitter even before the elections”

These were the 24 I could actually muster, now can you guys increase the list? The word, the meaning and the application of the word. I will be waiting to receive them here.

All the same, hope you enjoyed the ones I compiled? I drop my pen now. See you guys next week!

You can read more articles like this from Duru Chimezie, on 360talkatives by clicking here.

Banter without doors is a sponsored article that comes up every fridays. Don't miss it for anything in the world.

Your comments are like butter to my bread.. Pleeeaaassssseeee don't starve me!!! Follow us on twiter HERE like our page on facebook HERE Share this post to your friends, families.enemies infact everyone. FMB loves you.

MY 1,600 WORDS OF TOTAL NONSENSE: THE PART TWO!

This is a sponsored submission from 360talkatives blog.

this is pointless

He did 1600 words and called it plain nonsense. But instead of forgetting those, he has just done another 1600, which is obviously more nonsense than the last. Duru Chimezie's Banter Without Doors last week was the bomb and got a lot of readership, and this week, he has just added a part two to his pile of absolute crap. You'd love this.

(You can read the Part One here)

Last week, I wasted a wee bit over 2 hours of my time, putting together a wee bit over sixteen hundred (1,600) words of total rubbish and refuse. Then, after posting it here, I got the best-ever readership for any Banter article I have written on 360talkatives. Apparently, many people wasted a wee bit of their precious time on the absolute nonsense. While that may seem blatantly stupid, I wasn't going to turn a corner either, and go and get you a fresh article which is a bit less stupid. Not really. Wouldn't do that. Instead, I have increased the dose or pile of debris in our multi-roomed shit-housery. I have brought with me a zillion number of refuse bins and we are going to enjoy a lot more rubbish than we did last week. I mean, I have already begun saying the nonsense since from when you started reading this, and we are only just commencing. So it wouldn't really be so much of an absolutely bad idea if you have been thinking of gently crossing your legs while I serve you plate after plate of this terribly muddled-up heap of complete gobbledygook!

Now, what's the point of Zuma? If you have already known who or what I am referring to, then you can happily agree (with glee) that you are a game freak. If you still don't, then you are not (without glee though). However, to continue sharing brotherly love from the be gone Xmas, I'd want to simply explain Zuma as 'that thing' people do with either their phone or PC, where they try to force 'those things' that look like pebbles to disappear from 'that thing' that looks like a path before they get to that 'that thing' that looks like a skull. I hope I got it accurately spot-on as I haven't loved it enough to try it firsthand. And each time you ask those guys who have tried it, the answer you get is that they are 'playing a game' (I bet EA Sports and Konami have been producing toy guns then). So I repeat my question, what's the point of Zuma? I mean, if you eventually get the pebbles to beat the skull, how does that make the world better or save anyone's miserable day? (*slaps face*). You will definitely feel happier of course and probably share a smile or two even if no one is in the room with you, but after that, what becomes? Some trophies? Some presidential handshakes? I mean, what's the total point of increasing your heart beat by 13 beats per second only for you to smile and say "yea, you thought you would beat me and I proved you all wrong" at the end, while feeling particularly smart and clever? And just by yourself and to yourself. That is a serious question I am asking here and wishing I could get answers. We shouldn't bother about the question all being pointless and moronic since we are actually having a field day with rubbish and trash after all. I wonder what exactly they think they are doing - I mean the guys who do Zuma. Oh...playing a game, I suppose. I remember I said that before! Pheew!

But a rather more appealing argument is the woman hair. Now, not like the woman's hair is nonsense. Of course not. Although a good number of them are. I mean, the hair-do and not necessarily the natural hair. In fact, woman hair isn't nonsense except it is nonsense when seen. That is, mostly nonsense if it is an hair-do that is nonsense. Altogether, pardon my seeming paradox, for I am trying my best to explain what's nonsense about the woman hair, albeit not exactly sounding like I am talking nonsense.

The woman hair it is. While it sounds like human hair, it is woman hair I am focused on. Not exactly angry with it. No. I am just finding it difficult not to group a certain style or form of hair-do of the woman hair as nonsense. Especially, when it appears to be interfering with a basic bodily function. For instance, function of sight. So, get my picture; you are a lady and you have two eyes which function even a little over normal (something in the neighborhood of 132% perfection). Then, what exactly explains having the choice to make your hair, in such a manner that it is going to wipe off one of your eyes? You tell the artiste (or whoever gets paid for wiping out one's eye with the hair) to move the hair from its rightful place and then find a way of wrapping it around one of your eyes. Now, that is nonsense. Unless you don't know what's nonsense. But then, it isn't nonsense because it wrapped your left eye into blindness. Nope, not that. It is nonsense because most times, the lady isn't going to agree to remain blind. So while she enjoys the likely adulations that will come from people (of blind-loving kind), she is seen to always fling her head spontaneously at every four seconds, left and right; just to temporary sway the hair away from her eyes in a bid to gain temporary sight. That is the nonsense. Why can't you remain blind if you loved it this much? Wouldn't get an answer obviously. Not even from the boys. And I wouldn't pity the boys either. After all, the adulations aforementioned, would heavily come from them in majority. However, isn't it easy to carve out a saying that will say - "the blind does not call the blind, blind, since he can't see if the other blind is blind"? And if it is easy like I would want to think, then the boys who dash the praise are likely blind too. Maybe over two eyes instead of the lady's one but obviously not covered by man hair. The group of nonsense isn't dispersing very soon. The non-blind would love the blind. That is less nonsense anyway.

Then still on the boys. Nonsense still wishes to graduate. I have several reasons to think rubbish, you know. From boys who make their ties so short that they can pass for a teaspoon to the ones who wear Denim jeans with Senator tops (now this is more nonsense than most roadside debris). There are many gibberish available on the streets of Onitsha, Lagos and Aba but I just have to patiently settle for one. Not like it is actually very necessary to add more nonsense. Not exactly. But nonsense is nonsense, you know. And when it exactly stinks, both analogically and literally, then it's worth a place on my Banter Without Doors. This very pile of nonsense has kept my head bemused and rather stranded for a difficult 7 years now. Senseless as it might be, it is even more senseless what the rubbish about it, is. Socks. That is what it is. Some call them stockings and even sockings. Pheeeew!! Whatever!!! But socks is/are the problem! Now you may establish my nonsense, wouldn't you?.

Putting an obviously ludicrous boy who wears Denims under Senator shirts aside, what can be more aimless than wearing tuxedos (suits if you like) and tie-shirts (and with ties) without socks? I liken it to collecting all the sewage from the toilets in a building or group of buildings with PVC pipes, but instead of disposing them into a septic tank, you decide to dispose them on the floor right inside the compound. Begging the question, why then dint you leave people to defecate right on the floor? Collecting the sewage was aimless. Same with the guy on a tuxedo and without any socks. Why then did you wear the tuxedo and a shoe?! For James' sake, put on some socks! For all the fashionistas have tried to do in convincing the Queen of England as well as the rest of us, that fashion can really change and change up to the point where socks wouldn't be necessary, I still cannot find any other way to react to persons on corporate without socks other than plain dissent. You look more like Eze's headmaster (from Eze Goes To School) than anything else. Even most headmasters appeared a lot better given they mostly had their carton-coloured socks albeit being more of football hoses than socks. Even at that, they looked really smart in their own way. Not having your socks on, when you should is simply disgusting and passes the feeling that you must be clueless in some way and in dire need of someone to put you out of your misery. I haven't said that there are not times when you shouldn't be without the socks, though. But that has never included when you have a shirt and a tie, let alone a jacket/coat over the outfit. *Clears throat* When nonsense graduates, we call rubbish trucks to party! Simply irks my goat.

My bin is full after all. It was really a scatter gun of all sorts of debris. From knackered tin containers that looked soaked in wet mud to all types of human clothing, with dismembered parts. We really had our field day. Or should I say we really allowed nonsense to have its field day (strange I haven't used the word 'nonsense' for over two lines now. Don't bother cross-checking though. Wasn't talking about that).  While we seem to be packing our bags of trash, honorable mentions must be made of some other tolerable craps like, 2go (can someone wake them up and remind them we are in 2015 and with phones like the Galaxy? They might have upgraded to android but looks largely like a thing for java phones), BBM for android (after all the craze for BBM for android, of which it never agreed to install on both my android phones, I have heard from friends that it has become a total waste of space) and finally The African Cup of Nations (I'd rather watch Indoor Snow Skating than sit for 90mins watching that. Is Nigeria really this important?). Anyways, thanks for wasting a good 15 minutes of your time with me. I guess I owe you the 15 minutes all the same. While I drag my debris bag along, don't forget to check me back again next week. It's going to be less nonsense, but nonetheless exciting. See you guys around!

You can read more articles like this from Duru Chimezie, on 360talkatives by clicking here.


P.S BANTER WITHOUT DOORS is a weekly post that comes up every Friday. Don't miss it for anything in the world

Your comments are like butter to my bread.. Pleeeaaassssseeee don't starve me!!! Follow us on twiter HERE like our page on facebook HERE Share this post to your friends, families.enemies infact everyone. FMB loves you.