Thursday, June 20, 2019

The CP's Diary 6

New colleaque came in today and brought in her baby.
Me l carried baby in a bid to make her comfy plus the little human  is all shades of cute.
Then baby pukes, and pukes and pukes and Jus laidat my cologne smells different.
Ok. Ok. Ok. I can handle this! Like this is what motherhood feels like right? So l stay patient.

Mum steps out for some minutes. Something tells the baby to start crying.
Ah! I sang, danced, gave water remaining breast but she won't stop.
Few minutes is now looking like eternity. Took wrapper and backed her, she increased the pitch of her screams.
HAYGOD! Patients are coming in and keep passing all sort of unsolicited compliment.
Awww.. You will make a good mother.I know.
You guys look good together. I know.
Give her breast now. I am not lactating.
Everyone is trying to help. She won't stop. I'm considering speaking in tongues.
Then her mom steps in and this little cute human stops crying immediately and starts laughing.
Wow. Wow.
Lesson learnt. No more famzing. So l am going home wearing the smell of her puke as a memoir.

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