If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison, us do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?–william Shakespeare.
A legal scholar says that “ eye for an eye” justice is a lot more humane than you think. Another author says “don’t get mad, get even” some of us will agree that payback is a bitch, but sometimes it pays to be a bitch/jerk* raised eyebrow*. How do you go about crushing your foes so that they no longer get in your way?
It is perfectly normal to want someone to feel the pain and anguish that you feel especially when there are the source. After all, why would the person who’s ruined your day, week, or even your life go scot-free? Let’s face it – everyday there is at least one person who really pisses you off and while it would be great to ram their head into a roaring fire, it’s not exactly pratical aside the repercussions involved. Some people think the best way to get revenge is with violence. They throw a rock, punch a nose or start a war. Yet if you use violence for revenge, you hurt innocent people, destroy lives and might even end up in jail.
So what is the best way to revenge?
The cycle of revenge is one way to show that ‘two wrongs make a right’ is a logically fallacious claim, and also deconstructs the Golden Rule or at least how everybody uses it as a justification for punishment. It, more often than not, results in a tragedy of impulsiveness.
The best revenge you can have is simply moving on and getting over your troubles. Don’t give anyone the satisfaction of seeing you suffer, in other words kill with kindness*literally saying*. I mean being terribly kind to your adversaries.
Just know that it is important we acknowledge what we are feeling, the anger, unfairness and aversion- and really honour how much hurt we are. Repressing our feelings means they will come back again at some point, probably when another situation triggers a similar response.
Note, no one can hurt you unless you let them, respect yourself enough that you want to feel good, consider how you may have contributed to the situation, extend kindness ,
Lastly, forgive. When you forgive you set a prisoner free-you.